October 20, 2020
NOTE: If you only read one thing, please read Ashley’s paper (the end of my post), which she wrote honoring her Papa. It’s a beautiful tribute from her 14-year-old heart for a man many love and admire, but only five of whom know him as their beloved, precious Papa.
Our words matter. I’ve been reminded of this truth numerous times this week. These words, unexpected treasures, love notes that Ashley still finds a way to send…such very sweet gifts to my heart.
Zach moved out this week. Oh, the emotions! Rollercoaster! I’m so happy and so proud of Zach for stepping out in faith, following God’s direction. But does it hurt? Yes. He has been such a comfort and a comforting presence to this grieving Mama. And, anxiety and PTSD have often been my companions this week. For when my beautiful Ashley moved out, she was gone from me three weeks later. And it’s so hard to put those fears aside, to not think of them. So, yes…emotional. Well, that was a bit of a rabbit hole, but sometimes the rabbit hole gets you where you need to be, which is about words.
Because Zach moved out, I spent the day in his room…which was previously Ashley’s room. There were things that I knew were in there, but hadn’t been through them. Ashley’s memory boxes, and some school folders. I even found an amazing picture of Ashley that I truly don’t remember ever seeing, though I know her Dad was the photographer. But it’s words that we’re talking about…so what did I find?!
First, a note from a college teacher…Personal Finance. Papers I almost threw away, because…personal finance. But they’re Ashley’s, and so, yes, I had to look through them. And as I flipped through the pages, a slip of paper passed by. I glanced at it, continuing on…then thought, “Wait, what was that?” Backtracked to look a bit closer. Dr. Duke Griffey, presumably her professor. And I read it, as the words blurred together through my tears. Eight years later, the words he wrote to Ashley filled me with such pride and thankfulness. He didn’t have to write that note, but I just know he was such an encouragement to my amazing, sweet girl! And in that moment, I was so grateful for this professor who took the time to bless my daughter with his words. Yes, our words matter…and yes, I’ve been in touch with him.
Second, I was recently encouraged by a Gaither Homecoming show and sent them an email to tell them how it touched my heart. I worked with the Gaither’s many years ago, but they would certainly not remember me. Anyway, this same day of finding Ashley’s treasures, I received the most precious letter from Gloria, a gifted wordsmith of God’s grace. Her words refreshed my spirit, just as the words of their music refresh my heart.
Third, and most special…a paper Ashley wrote about her grandfather, her Papa. She was 14 when she wrote it. I don’t think he’s ever seen it; I have a vague memory of her writing it. As Dad battles cancer and struggles with pain, I pray this brings a special grace to him today. And if Dad comes to mind, please pray for him, because those aren’t just words…they are sacred words of prayer to our Father who loves us beyond measure. Ashley so loved her grandparents, and they so loved her. It is a tribute from her heart that I would have probably never found…but for her absence.
Our words matter. THE word, Jesus, matters even more! In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the word was God…Through Him all things were made (John 1:1-3). How were they made Through His words. Everything He created was spoken into existence. If God used His words to speak creation into existence, then surely my words are important. They speak life and death. Our words have so much power! Our words matter. And life is so short…too short to be unkind. There are so many Scriptures about our words: both the good we can do, and the evil we can do.
For now, I’ll borrow from Isaac Newton: For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, and that is never more true than what happens to the receiver of our words. The size of the force acting on the second object. If you think of the power of your anger directed toward your child, oh, can’t you see their little spirits deflate? But when they are lovingly encouraged and blessed by our words, their beautiful smiles radiate the joy of your affirmation! Our words can be a blessing or a curse. Not just to our children or our spouse, but everyone that we deal with…every day. (See James 3:3-10, and so many Scriptures in Proverbs!)
If you can speak words of grace, peace, encouragement, or love…don’t hesitate. If God puts a thought of blessing in your head, say it. Or better yet, write it! You just never know the ripples that can flow from your words… They can truly echo through the years…as Ashley’s words, and the words of a professor, and the words of lyricist…radiated and filled me with such soaring love and gratefulness this week.
Ashley Giffen
September 25, 2006
My Grandfather
He was there for me when I took my first step. He was there for me on my first day of school, and he was by my side the first time I learned to ride my bike. He was there for me when I fell, and he was there for me when I got up. Who, you may ask, is he? Well, he is my grandfather, and he is one of the closest and dearest friends I will ever have.
As the years go by, my grandfather is getting older. When he speaks, his voice comes out softer and scragglier. His elbows and knees have shrivelled up like a prune. His hair is as white as snow, and he cannot leave the house without glasses. Yet, considering all of these things, he is still young at heart. Not only is he young at heart, but he is also one of the most athletic men I know. He does not look strong and buff, but he can run for hours on end. Every night he goes into his garage and works out for almost an hour on a treadmill. I do not think I could run as much as he does! Aside from being old, young at heart, and physically strong, he is also strong in the Lord.
Even though he is now very ill with cancer, he still relies on the Lord whole-heartedly. If anything, his illness has brought him closer to the Lord. When he was diagnosed with cancer, the doctors gave him only two years to live. Since then, it has been ten years. He has been through several treatments, and he has exceeded the doctors’ expectation immensely.
It seems to me that the cancer has made him realize how precious life is. His main goal in life is to tell the ENTIRE world about God. For example, the first time he went into the hospital to get a cancer treatment, he immediately started preaching to the nurses. He even preached to the strangers sitting next to him! It was a very interesting thing to watch.
Likewise, I have never known my grandfather to hold a grudge, to give someone a mean look, or even to yell. He realises that is not something the Lord would do. I remember when I was little, he was the only person in my family that never spanked me, and never yelled at me. By doing that, he earned my innermost respect. That may sound childish, but it meant a lot to me, and it still does mean a lot to me.
Now, I know he is not perfect, but he is the closest person I know to perfect. Every day he strives to be better, and to be a good example of the Lord. Everywhere he goes h tries to show the Lord in some way or another. That man would probably preach to a brick wall.
Considering all of these things, he is the most selfless person I know. I do not think there is anyone in this entire world that I could wish to be more like. Even celebrities do not compare to him. I do not know how long he is going to be around, but he has been there for me my whole life, and I know he will be there for me as long as he is alive.
