Easter encapsulates so much beauty…spring, babies, nature, new life, Resurrection. It is a day of hope…a day to rejoice in the power of Jesus to overcome death with life. For me, Easter is a day that holds opposites within my heart. Easter is a sacred space that will always be a part of my heart and my life. Amazing joy at all that His resurrection represents, of sweet memories of my own childhood Easters, and of the Easters celebrated with my children, Ashley & Zachary. I cherish each of those moments. However, there is also an undeniable deep grief and pain, for it was Easter Sunday, 2019 when my daughter died…when she was resurrected to heaven. My heart holds so many emotions on this day.

After Ashley’s death, I wondered how I could possibly begin to bring back some of the joy of this sacred day?! In 2021, I decided to make Easter baskets again (Ashley and I had made hospital Easter baskets together on two previous occasions)…to honor the times Ashley and I made them…to do something special on this day…to remind me of all the beauty of Easter and all that it represents, to ensure Ashley still has a legacy. Making the Easter baskets with Ashley was and still remains a sweet memory, and so became a perfect way to honor her beautiful life.

There are several reasons why you are receiving an Ashley’s Legacy Easter Bag, and I’d like to share the “why” with you: 1) As a NICU nurse, I love the babies and parents who are in my care and want to bless them in a tangible way. 2) As a Christian, this day is an integral part of my faith and my love for Christ. 3) As a Mom whose daughter passed away on Easter Sunday, I have chosen to honor her life in a meaningful way…Ashley’s Legacy. 4) My son, Zach, was in the NICU; he’s now 25 and doing well. I still remember how it felt, and the specialness of the gifts received during that time! (Side note: Zach’s NICU stay is the reason I became a nurse!)

Because of Jesus’ death and resurrection, I know where Ashley is, and I know that I will see her again. In spite of the daily presence of her absence, I have peace in knowing that we will be reunited. Easter will likely always be a day of opposite emotions…both joy and pain. And yes, dwelling in the space of these two extremes is ok; I can do often even feel both emotions at the same time. As a NICU parent, you likely have days of both emotions, also. For a NICU journey is often two steps forward and one step back. Hang on, sweet parent. Know that your baby is in an amazing place, and has so many compassionate people caring for him or her. And most importantly, they have you, their loving Mommy and/or Daddy caring for them and cheering them on with every milestone they reach!!

I hold onto my faith in God; it is truly what has gotten me through to today. God’s promises are many, and I choose to remind myself of His many precious promises. This is one of my favorite promises of heaven: “In my Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also” (John 14:2-3 NKJV). As sure as I’m sitting here writing on this computer, I’m sure Ashley and I will be reunited in heaven. And, yes, His promises bring me comfort and joy.

When Ashley died, there were many months when I didn’t think I’d ever have joy in my life again. But, I do. Because of Jesus. Joy is the very nature of my relationship with Him, and is an eternal part of who I am. Did it take a while? Yes, it did. I was shattered when Ashley died. But the truth of all that is in the Bible, the truth of my Savior helping me through each day, the truth of heaven and of salvation, the truth of God’s love and His abiding presence…well, that, sweet Mama and Daddy, brings joy and hope and peace.

For GOD so loved the world…He loves me and you!!! That He gave His only Son, that anyone who believes in Him will not perish, but will have eternal life. That right there is the greatest promise for me because I know that I know that I know that God loves me, that He loves Ashley, and that He gave Jesus for each of us, and that we will be eternally with one another and with Him. Jesus, who died on that horribly magnificent day of Good Friday. Horrible because the death He died was undeserved and a ruthless, ugly miscarriage of justice. Magnificent because He paid the justice that I deserved, for I am a sinner. Jesus was not; He was sinless. Yet for me…for you, He died a horrifying death. And the people around Him thought it was over, that Jesus was dead. Those who loved Him were broken and confused, and having my daughter die, I understand that brokenness and confusion.

But…Jesus…Did…Not…Stay…Dead!!!

He came to life on Easter Sunday!! The empty tomb of Jesus is the greatest place of divine mercy! Can you imagine what that Sunday was like for His Mama, for His beloved disciples?! Because of His death and resurrection, Ashley’s death was just a move from this earth to her real home of heaven, where she waits for me. Not in a dreary, sad way. She is more joyful and more at peace than I could ever imagine. But that is where she now resides and I will one day join her, and that brings hope and joy!! Ashley was resurrected to heaven on this Resurrection Sunday of 2019. How amazing is that?!

Six years later, there are things that bring my heart comfort. But, nothing would bring me greater joy today than to know that you gave your life to Christ this day…Easter Sunday, to know that you, like Ashley, will be resurrected to heaven, to know that Ashley’s Legacy lives on in an eternal way. Please let me know if you make that decision to follow Christ or if I can help you in any way (you can fill out the form on the contact page or send me an email at gayla@gaylaslife.com. I would love to hear from you! (Also, if you want to send me pics of you and/or your little one with the Easter bag, I would love to receive them!!)

If you are (or have been) one of my NICU families, thank you for allowing me to be part of your baby’s first Easter. Whatever NICU your precious baby is in, you and your sweet little one are not forgotten. I pray Easter is a beautiful day of blessing and that this Easter basket or bag will hold a small part of making memories with your precious baby. Each bag was created with much love and prayer. I pray that you will know and find joy in the One, Jesus, who makes all things new and who is the risen Savior and meaning of Easter. I pray you have a Blessed Easter, and that your precious baby is home with you soon! 💕

There are two special things in the basket that are specifically Ashley-approved: 1) Pink was her favorite color, so there are pink pens; 2) Reeses was her favorite candy, and is also included.

2025 is my fifth year of making Ashley’s Legacy NICU Easter Basket Blessings: There are 30 big baskets for my NICU and 230ish smaller bags for two hospitals in San Antonio, one in OKC, one in Tulsa, and one in Ft. Smith, Arkansas. It would be amazing to be able to do them in more hospitals in this area. If you want to help me with that, there’s an Amazon link below.

(If you work in a NICU, and would like to receive the Easter baskets, please let me know. My only requirement is that the bags be given as created, including the tag with the QR code.) I am a faith-based charity, so the QR code is very important to me, and may not be removed.

If you would like to donate, here is an Amazon wish list: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1TN06DTFZ1E7D?ref_=wl_share  (Some items are not yet listed as I don’t want them to expire within a year, so if you don’t see something, check back in about six months when I’ll be adding these items.)

Here are a couple of other links, should you like to read further.

Post from Easter 2020:

https://gaylaslife.com/easterhome-april-12-2020/

The story of Ashley’s last day:

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